Three Months

My sweet girl you are three months old today! This morning I took you in for your three month pictures and a stroll around the mall. You are such a good baby. You hang out in your stroller and take in all the sights, coo and smile when people stop to talk to you, and rarely make a grump. Sofie, you'd better get a lot less fun to hang out with if you're interested in being an only child for long.

This month has been big for you. It seems like every time I turn around you're trying your hand at something new. You are getting so strong, and your body is no longer a flailing mass. Now it is under your control, an extension of you, and you're delighted to shove your hand in my mouth for some kisses, or pull your toys down from your activity bar. You interact with us beautifully. One of your favorite things to do is to blow raspberries at us and wait for us to blow them back. When you were first learning how you would work so hard to get your tongue to go where you wanted it, then work so hard to get some air to come out (sometimes it would come out your nose!) and then when you finally got it right you'd light up with your accomplishment. You also love it when papa blows raspberries on you. You are closest to laughing when he gets your belly, cheeks, and chubby thighs. You were teasing us weeks ago with your first little chuckle, and we've been anxiously unsuccessful at squeezing more out of you ever since.

This month you've also learned to languish in your stretches, and you arch your little back and throw your little arms straight up over your head gleefully. When we change your diaper your little legs stiffen straight out and you grunt as if you've been waiting all day for a chance to do just that.

I spend a lot of time imagining what you'll look like with hair and teeth, what kinds of questions you'll bowl me over with, and what types of interests you'll develop in your lifetime. I'm so grateful that I get to play a key role in your happy childhood memories. I don't know how much your little three month being can understand, but when you're nursing and you look up at me with your eyes sparkling and we both can't keep from grinning, I believe you can feel just how much I love you. I hope that even when you're making me walk six feet behind you at the mall, you'll know that I'm still grinning and I still love you.

For Sentimentality's Sake

This morning as I was clearing Sofie's closet and dresser of the clothes that she's already outgrown in her short little life, I realized that she had never worn one very special sleeper. It's a sleeper that was worn by her Aunt Janna, her Daddy, and her Uncle Kyle, and more recently by her cousins Lillian and Clayton. Now, I am a sucker for traditions, and because I would like to continue that tradition, and hopefully pass the sleeper along to future generations, I decided to see if it would still fit. Thank goodness I found it today! I'm pretty sure another week or so and it would have been outgrown as well.

...and just in case you can't tell how much our worm has grown, here is a shameless display of her tubby belly and her thunder thighs!

We love you twinkle toes...

Teething?

Maybe I'm crazy, but I think Sofie might be showing some early signs of teething. She's been rather cranky lately, sucking on her fists a lot, constantly wants to nurse, and she's been blowing spit bubbles. It's especially cute when we blow raspberries at her and she makes her spit bubbles back at us. Yesterday I popped my finger in her mouth to feel around her gums and she grinned and grinned at me. I assume it felt good...I guess we'll have to wait and see.

There's not much new or exciting going on around these parts lately. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone at Thanksgiving and dreading going back to work full-time. I'm working on finding a good place to chop off all my hair. I think maybe "mom hair" will help me shave some precious time off the morning routine. Getting up at 4:30 is getting old!

As Promised...

The grunts crack me up.

Rolling over is hard work when you're just a little bean!

Christmas Challenge

Unbelievably, Christmas is right around the corner once again. Money is tight at our house, as always, so I've been brainstorming some ways that we can keep Christmas affordable, yet still make it fun. This year we've come up with a "Christmas Challenge"; to gather the money for Christmas entirely from things we already have around the house. This means selling some things that we're not using anymore on Ebay, raiding the change jug in the laundry room, and scraping together credit left-over on gift cards. I have no idea how much cash we'll actually be able to come up with, but I'm estimating we'll be working with about a $15.00 per person spending limit. I've always loved a good challenge, and I'm actually pretty excited about this one, but I need some help from all of your "great brains." I'm working on coming up with a good list of ideas for frugal, yet much appreciated, Christmas gifts. Following are some of my favorites so far...please please please help me out with some of yours!

Holiday Themed Gifts (a beautiful ornament, a great holiday CD...)
Gift Cards (Caribou/Starbucks, Borders, movie theater, lottery...)
Tickets (...I'm not sure what you can get tickets to for $15.00, but I've always loved "experience" type gifts...)
Little Luxuries (A bottle of wine, L.A. Burdick's chocolates...)
Reading Material (Magazine subsription, great book...)

I'll probably add to this list as I think of more goodies...check back if you're interested!

Frustrated

For about a week now I've been looking for something that Sofie and I could get involved in together. I've scoured the Internet for infant story hours, exercise groups, and playgroups, and I'm really feeling a bit angry. It's not that I haven't found anything...there are plenty of activities for moms and their little ones to be a part of. The problem is that they all meet at hours that are clearly geared towards stay-at-home parents. I hate the message that this is perpetuating. It's as if, just because I am a working mom, I don't have the desire for my child to have enriching activities in her life. That somehow I must not need the support that comes from interacting with other parents. Disgusting.

If anyone knows of an activity or group that is not exclusive to the stay-at-home crowd, I would be so grateful if you would share the information with me. Otherwise, I'll set to work on getting the ball rolling myself...who knows, maybe this is how I'll make my millions!

Mobile

It must be the week for firsts! The worm is now officially mobile. Video soon!

Guess who...

...is on the verge of letting out a belly laugh!!! One little chuckle escaped her impish little body today. I am just beside myself with anticipation!

Juggling

I'm used to juggling. I think anyone who has spent much time in school has probably gotten quite good at juggling. There's school (of course) but usually there's also work and all the responsibilities of home as well. I know that doesn't sound like all that much, but the problem with school is that you're never "off" at the end of the day. There's always some paper to write or some exam to study for. There's always SOMETHING looming in the back of your head that you SHOULD BE DOING!!

Going back to work/school "part-time" (36+ hours a week) has been a challenge, but do-able, and very rewarding in its own ways. Very soon, however, (December 3rd) I am expected to be back to work five days a week, 60+ hours, on top of the various homework assignments, papers, and exams that are still required of me, and quite frankly I don't want to do it. It's not that I don't feel capable of juggling...I'm quite confident in my ability to push myself and keep all the balls in the air...it's just that I have no desire to make the sacrifices that are required to keep them there.

I've worked very hard to be where I am, and I'm very grateful for the opportunities I've earned because of that, but right now I just want to savor Sofie's baby-hood. It's such a sweet time, and in the grand scheme of things it goes by so quickly. I can't get it back and there are no do-overs. I feel like women have a weighty decision to make...what do we choose to allow to take priority in our lives? Career or family? I believe that we can enjoy them both, but ultimately one has to be more important than the other. One has to guide and shape the direction of the other. I feel like it's time for me to make that decision, and I know that while I may regret never reaching the top of my field, I would, without a doubt, regret not feeling "present" for my family. I'm not sure what that means, in tangible ways, for the near future. I do know that it is so deeply difficult to let go of the level of expectations I've held for myself for such a long time. It is painful to feel like I'm failing at something I've worked so hard for, and it is so incredibly intimidating to need to express to someone who has very likely compromised their own family for their career successes, that I need to make the exact opposite decision for myself.

And so, Internet, please gather up your happy thoughts and send them my way in these next few weeks. I know that the most important decisions are often the hardest ones to make, but they always seem just a little easier when you know that your friends and family believe in you and know that you are doing the right thing...

...and now, what you all really come here for, pictures of the Scrunchy Bunchy Munchkin!

Observe the "Queen of the Bed" behavior, and the incredible daddy-likeness.

Irresistable cuteness.

She's been hatching a lot of diabolical plans lately!