Two Months

My roly poly little man, two days ago you became a two month old. Almost two weeks ago I had you in to see the pediatrician because you had spit-up quite forcefully a few times and she suggested that perhaps you were maybe overeating just a bit since you were not quite two months old yet and closing in on 14 pounds already...oy! And I thought your sister, who was nearly 12 pounds at two months old, was a chunker :)

***I must be honest and report that the rest of this post, on October 8th, consisted merely of little notes to myself and only now, on October 20th, am I finding the time to return to fill in the details!***

You started smiling a few weeks ago and that has made you much more fun to hang out with. When you're particularly happy your little nose scrunches up and wrinkles form between your eyes. You draw in your breath and squeak like some folks do after a particularly hearty bout of laughter. You like to interact with your toys, grinning, batting, and jabbering at them, especially the monkey on the mirror that reflects your face into the rear-view mirror of our van. It's always a treat to click your car seat into place and watch you greet your little friend!

One day Sofie and I were sitting on the couch goofing around and laughing about something and you were nestled in my lap. I glanced down and noticed that you were smiling away as if you were in on our little jokes, and just like that my whole perspective changed. I had been caring for you and Sofie as separate little 'ploys, juggling each of your needs throughout the day and paddling my boat between your islands trying my best to give each of you undivided attention. All of the sudden we were a team. Shortly after that incident I was alone in the evening with the two of you for the first time and trying to put Sofie down for bed. Her bedtime routine still includes nursing, and you were fussing and wanting to nurse too. I didn't want to leave one or the other of you to cry so I reluctantly decided that I was going to try some true tandem nursing. I was worried that Sofie was going to be upset about it or that you would be a ball of squirminess, unable to get comfortable within your sister's space, but instead the two of you seemed to think it was great fun. You were so focused on Sofie and she just giggled away at you and held your little hand in hers. It just reinforced the sense that we are together now, a family, and I stopped frantically paddling and docked my boat. We've been learning to live together on the mainland ever since.

***And now, embarrassingly, it is October 27th and in less than two weeks you will be three months old. How busy you've kept me! I hope to be much more punctual in the months to come...***

You've been hard at work on getting your thumb in your mouth and I often find you busily slobbering all over your hand in your futile attempts. Somehow, your hand becomes possessed by the intensity of your quest and it clenches tightly into a fist right around your little thumb. You're not a bit disheartened by it's uncooperative nature and go right on jamming your fist into your mouth and sucking away. You love to stand up and when I make the mistake of trying to sit you down on my lap for a chat you lean your little body forward and flex your legs until I get the right idea. Your little legs are so strong, it's as if you'll be walking in no time!

It's strange to me how different it already feels to be raising a little boy. I'm already torn up by the thought that someday, maybe, you'll love some other woman more than you love me. But for now, my little Moose, I'm the one who cares for you, soothes you, makes your eyes light up. For now, and for many moons to come, I am the one. There is no fortune more great.